Je N'ai Pas De Mots
by Mickey february9
Summary: Tamaki has fully realized his feelings for Haruhi Fujioka, but he isn't quite ready to confess. So...he wrote a song. ONE-SHOT, inspired by "Je N'ai Pas De Mots" by Vic Mignogna. (This story has been modified from its original version...)


**Disclaimer: **I don't own Ouran High School Host Club, obviously. But disclaimers are always nice…

Author's Note: So what inspired me to write this mushy formation of words I call a fanfic? Well, I was watching the Ouran High School Host Club anime series again except this time in English. ^-^ So as most of you are aware _Vic Mignogna _is the English VA for Tamaki, and we all know he has a lovely singing voice. A while ago I came across a song by Vic titled _"Je N'ai Pas De Mots" _which means "I Have No Words" in French. Naturally after watching the Ouran Dub and then listening to this song I envisioned Tamaki, sitting down playing his grand piano and singing this song…...about Haruhi. There also won't be any kissy-kissy lovey dovey stuff in here. This is about Tamaki and Haruhi fully discovering their feelings for each other, nothing more…

I love the TamaHaru pairing. It's cute & canon!

BTW this is my first Ouran fanfic.

Special Thanks to _nakima-chan_ from **ThReE gIrLs WiTh PoCkY** for looking this over and giving me pointers!

**UPDATE: 2013! I've been going through my old stories and modifying them to abide by the rules set by FF. I don't want my story to be deleted, after having it on here for years now, for something stupid like uploading a songfic with lyrics to a copyrighted song when it isn't allowed. I know people who have had their stories deleted, and I am not going through that! So t****his story, in particular, has been changed and NO longer includes the lyrics to this nice-soothing song. I encourage you to find the song and listen to it; the lyrics are lovely and I think you will enjoy it if you are an Ouran fan (and haven't already discovered it). The lyrics that Tamaki has written in the story ARE those of "Je N'ai Pas De Mots." I hope this story is still enjoyable despite the changes! **

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**Je N'ai Pas De Mots**

**By**

**Mickey february9**

It was mid-afternoon on a late winter day in Japan. Another school day had just ended at Ouran Academy. 2nd year student, and the famous president of the Ouran High School Host Club Tamaki Suoh walked down the lavishly polished floors of the music hall with his book bag draped over his shoulder and a purple scarf made of wool around his neck. He stopped in front of Music Room # 3 where he carefully opened the doors to the home of the Ouran Host Club.

He stepped into the abandoned music room and quickly skimmed the spacious area to ensure that no one else was occupying it. Tamaki gave a relieving sigh and walked over to one of the many outstretched windows in the room and admired the light snow that fell from the azure sky. Although Club was cancelled for the day, Tamaki decided to stay after school for a while. He needed a few minutes of solitude to absorb his newfound feelings for a certain young woman; the lady of the Host Club, Haruhi Fujioka.

He was usually so open with his feelings especially around the Host Club. In fact it was hard for Tamaki to even consider hiding his emotions, he never even attempted to conceal himself. He wore no mask, Tamaki Suoh was truly an honest person at heart. The bond he shared with Kyoya, Hunny, Mori, the Hitachiin Twins and Haruhi was much like a family in his eyes. Hikaru had told Tamaki that while the Host Club had a strong bond that couldn't be broken easily, they were not a family. And because the Host Club wasn't a "family" Tamaki's feelings for Haruhi were put to question.

Tamaki had insistently labeled Haruhi as his Daughter and referred to himself as her Father while frivolously giving Kyoya the title as Mother. And somehow the Host Prince had deluded himself into thinking that he was indeed Haruhi's father, contrary to any fantastical daydreams he may have had about her. The latter had confused Tamaki for the longest time. He'd had romantic fantasies about Haruhi even though he was "suppose" to be a father-like figure in her life. The idea of a father falling love and having an intimate relationship with his daughter is a taboo concept that utterly disgusted Tamaki to no end, and because of this he felt a grave guilt for even possessing such fervent affections towards the androgynous brunette. However the sole reality was that Tamaki had only placed himself as a father figure to Haruhi because he wanted to have a special place in her life. He knew that Haruhi was a special person to him. But special in what way?

_How do I feel about Haruhi?_ This question harbored Tamaki's thoughts for the past month. He knew that he cared for her a great deal. He was extremely protective of her and became exaggerantly jealous whenever another guy came too close to his "precious daughter". All he wanted was the best for Haruhi; to see her vibrant smile and to hear her laugh. As long as Haruhi remained happy he would too. All the troubles Tamaki was facing with his paternal Grandmother and family situation all seemed to melt away whenever he was near Haruhi, and of course the rest of the Host Club.

Kyoya, Tamaki's best friend and Vice President of the Club, always had advice and comforting words at hand for him; not to mention the cleverly thought out schemes and tactics that Kyoya had intricately executed to ensure the happiness of the Host Club and everyone involved. Unbeknownst to Tamaki every single member of the Host Club admired him for his kind, selfless and excepting nature. He was the center of the Host Club, the glue that held the group together. But how did Haruhi feel about him? What did Tamaki mean to her?

All these thoughts and questions created excess turmoil for the poor violet-eyed blonde. Even though Tamaki was very perceptive of others situations he always met with confusion when his own feelings and desires were concerned. Tamaki had considered the possibility that he might actually be in love with Haruhi but he quickly chased the idea out of his mind. The thought of having a romantic relationship with Haruhi made his heart race uncontrollably against his chest. The sensation was too much for the guy. But was a romantic relationship with Haruhi really what he wanted?

The fantasies he had about the both of them together as a couple spoke clearly. The answer was, Yes. He was infatuated with Haruhi. But he wasn't ready to confess to her. He couldn't find the courage to openly announce a declaration of love to Haruhi as Hikaru had done before. Tamaki would definitely tell Haruhi his feelings, but first he needed to prepair his heart, he needed to be ready for Haruhi's reply when the time came.

The stunning young man looked away from the window and closed his eyes. Looking back he couldn't believe how dense he had been. It took him so long to realize his feelings for Haruhi. Tamaki took a deep breath and started towards the cream colored curtains in the corner of the music room. He gently parted aside the curtains revealing a rich dark colored grand piano. Tamaki took a seat on the cushioned piano bench, placed his book bag on his lap and began rummaging through it. After a few brief seconds he pulled out a couple of music sheets containing lyrics to a song he'd written the previous night.

His newfound love for Haruhi had inspired the work he held so delicately in his hands. The Host Prince skimmed through the sheets admiring his product. It was a song about being in love and being with the one you love. Although Tamaki had no prior experience with song writing he had to admit it the lyrics were actually good even if they were a bit over glorified. Tamaki had definitely written about a situation he'd never actually been in before, he'd never been with the one he loved but the feeling and intent was still there. These lyrics came from the heart.

Tamaki placed his sheets on the pianos music stand and began playing the intro with his soft lovelorn vocals following suit.

Pacing through the elegant hallways of Ouran, Haruhi Fujioka found herself heading towards the Third Music Room in search of her misplaced History notebook.

'…_.It wasn't in my book bag, and I checked all my classes, this is the only place it could be…'_ thought the young woman as she continued walking towards her destination.

Just short of reaching the abandoned music room Haruhi heard the soft sound of a piano being played. The brunette stood in front of the doors to the music room, realizing the origin of the melodious ambient she was hearing. She hesitanly reached for the door handle having seconds thoughts about entering the room with the possibility of disturbing whom ever was inside.

' _I'm just going to take my notebook and leave…'_.

As Haruhi gently opened the door the music became more clear and reverent. Her eyes followed the sound of the music, leading her sight to the far left hand corner of the room where she spotted the handsome Tamaki Suoh. He sat there playing the grand piano, his eyes closed, and fingers gracefully moving across the keys. Haruhi was fascinated by what she was seeing. Tamaki looked so at peace as he sat their playing his music, it was almost as though he was in another world entirely. She was entranced, but what she heard next completely enthralled her.

"_Je N'ai pas de mots..."_

Haruhi was in awe. She had never heard Tamaki sing before. His voice was beautiful and soft, almost ethereal. This was a different side of him she'd never seen before. Haruhi stood there admiring her senpai as he began the second verse of the song. Haruhi's heart pounded against her chest. Tamaki was the only person who made her feel this way. She'd realized a while ago that she held strong feelings for him but she wasn't sure if it was love. Then again how would she know, she'd never fallen for anyone before. Haruhi's affection for the princely character had grown gradually overtime since she met him.

Tamaki was always there whenever she was in trouble or needed compassion. When he wasn't acting childish, over the top and completely ridiculous Tamaki was always willing to help those in need. He possessed a driving passion to bring happiness to others within the Host Club and beyond. At Kyoya's private beach when Haruhi stood up to a couple of punks who were harassing the Host guests and ended up getting pushed of a cliff, falling into the sea; Tamaki was there to save her from drowning. When the Host Club stayed at Kyoya's private mansion on that rainy night Tamaki was there to comfort her through her fear of thunder. He told her that she wasn't alone and that he'd be there for her. When Haruhi was sick and skipped school Tamaki searched for her and brought her home, tending to her cold while her father was still at work. Without even knowing it Tamaki had given her so much. He'd expanded her world in so many ways.

The honor student had every intention of telling the spontaneous blonde of her feelings, but she didn't want to act upon it just yet. She wanted to wait a while until their friendship deepened more, then she could talk to him about anything. A smile spread across Haruhi's face as Tamaki's angelic vocals filled the room once more.

_"Je N'ai pas de mots..."_

The room fell silent as Tamaki played his final note and gazed at his music sheets. He felt as if a weight had been lifted from his shoulders. Expressing his feelings through song helped Tamaki feel better about his situation. He grinned and reached for his book bag, placing his music sheets in their respective folder.

Haruhi walked up slowly towards Tamaki who turned slightly in his seat at the sound of light footsteps. His eyes filled with shock and surprise as he saw Haruhi coming his way. Tamaki's face suddenly felt warm and his heart started beating uncontrollably. He was nervous.

"Ha-Ha-Haruhi?…um"

"Tamaki-senpai" she stopped a few feet in front of him. "I'm sorry for suprising you like this. I came here looking for my notebook, but then I saw that you were playing the piano and I didn't want to disturb you."

The room went silent once again as Tamaki's cheeks instantly turned bright red with embarrassment. He shamefully covered his face temporarily with one hand and found himself stumbling over his words.

"Um…Ha-Haruhi, how mu-much d…did you hear?" apprehension built up inside of the helpless host for he hoped that Haruhi hadn't heard much of his song.

Haruhi suddenly got the feeling that she shouldn't have been there, she wasn't suppose to hear the song. But for some reason she was glad that she did. "Well, I've been here for about three minutes"

Tamaki's whole face stained red at her response. This was a disaster, Haruhi wasn't suppose to hear the song. What did she think about it? What would she say if she knew the song was written about her? How would Tamaki explain himself if she found out? However, If Haruhi were to ask he could always just lie and say that the song was just something he "found". Haruhi would never have to know the truth behind the song, all Tamaki needed to do was lie. And sure enough, Haruhi asked…

"That song you were playing was amazing! I didn't know you had such a lovely singing voice." she gave Tamaki an admiring smile, erasing any doubt the young pianist might have had.

Hearing those words from her left him feeling relieved and rejoiced. He lessened the distance between them, placed both hands on Haruhi's shoulders and looked into her brown eyes.

"You… really think so?"

Haruhi gave a nod and enthusiastically replied, "I never heard that song before, is it an original?"

Tamaki hesitated to answer the question he dreaded that she would ask. Unfortunately his honesty conquered and any considerations he'd taken to lying were immediately forgotten.

"Yes, I wrote it last night" Tamaki mentally cursed himself as the truth spilled from his lips. It seemed that he wouldn't be able to keep his love for Haruhi a secret for much longer. He panicked, kneeling in front of Haruhi begging for forgiveness as a string of nearly incomprehensible sentences left his mouth.

"Oh-My-Gosh-Haruhi!The-Lyrics-Were-So-Horrible-Suc h-Trash-Should-Never-Reach-Your-Precious-Ears!

Haruhi stared dumbfounded as an over exaggerated stream of tears poured from Tamaki's eyes onto the floor. The prince continued his sentences without pausing for air.

"I-Wrote-The-Song-About-You-But-I-Never-Meant-For- You-To-Hear-It! I-Really-Really-Like-You-Haruhi-And-I-Know-My-Feel ings-Are-Unrequited-But-I-Care-About-You-And-I-Jus t-Want-You-To-Be-Happy. Please-Don't-Hate-Me! Please-Tell-Me-What-I-Can-Do-To-Make-It-Up-To-You. 

I'LL DO ANYTHING!"

Haruhi stood there unsure of how to respond. She started to wonder if her ears heard him correctly. That beautiful song Tamaki had just sung was about her? He cared for her, the same way she cared for him? Did Tamaki even realize what he had just said? Haruhi was stuggling, she wanted to tell him how she felt so badly, but what if this wasn't the right time. She liked Tamaki too but she didn't want to loose the friendship they had. What if they became a couple and things started getting awkward between them. She didn't want that. But she couldn't keep hiding her feelings. Going on like this wouldn't solve anything.

After a few long seconds without a reply Tamaki stood back on his feet and made his way towards the grand piano to retrieve his book bag, mistakenly taking Haruhi's silence as a sign of rejection. The heartbroken teenager walked up to her and bowed respectfully.

"I'm sorry…." Tamaki managed to utter as tears trickled from his eyes when he passed by Haruhi. The ambivalent brunette saw hurt in his eyes, and it was all her fault. Without thinking Haruhi grabbed Tamaki's arm, the next thing she saw were his tearfilled voilet eyes gazing at her in surprise.

"Ha-Haruhi?…" she interrupted him, sounding somewhat irritated with his behavior.

"Listen! First of all I don't hate you and I don't see why you feel the need to apologize. There shouldn't be any need to ask my permission to write a song." Haruhi paused for a moment and took a deep breath, for she knew her next words could potentially change their relationship. Tamaki wiped his tears on the sleeves of his light blue blazer when Haruhi continued.

"…..And you're wrong Tamaki, I care about you too and I like you a lot. You're kind, always finding ways to make those around you happy. You're annoying and you spaz over some of the most trivial things. But, you're the most genuine person I've ever met. You never hide your true self, you're you all the time, a sensitive, caring and selfless person; and I admire you for that."

Overjoyed by what he had just heard Tamaki pulled Haruhi into his arms "Thank You, Haruhi" he said with a warm smile on his face. Haruhi dropped her book bag and returned the embrace, making herself comfortable against his chest. They stayed that way for awhile, reveling in the moment of being in each others arms. Haruhi loosened Tamaki's hold on her and viewed his jubilant face.

"Tamaki, I love your song, the lyrics and the music. It was very sweet." Tamaki couldn't stop smiling. Haruhi liked his song, she cared for him too. The feeling was mutual and he couldn't have asked for more.

In one fell swoop the charming Host Club president lifted Haruhi into his arms and began twirling across the music room, frolicking in an imaginary field of flowers. Haruhi started giggling like a little girl, giving off one of her many facial expressions that Tamaki adored so much. Tamaki let out a fanboy squeal at the sight of this, setting Haruhi back on her feet, bringing the girl into another embrace.

"Oooooooooh , You Look So CUTE"

Haruhi's face flushed at his comment. Tamaki noticed her rosy complexion and gently brushed his fingers against her cheek, cupping her face in his hands. Another silence filled the air. Tamaki's glimmering violet eyes met Haruhi's rich brown orbs, their hearts racing a mile a minute. At that moment Tamaki threw all rationality out the window an acted on impluse. He eased his face, slowly closing the distance between them. Haruhi closed her eyes in anticipation, knowing what was going to happen. Their lips only lightly brushed against each other when...

Tamaki's "Sakura Kiss" ringtone went off causing him too immediately back away from Haruhi, damning his accursed cell phone for its lousy timing. He turned around and reached for his black cell phone in his pants pocket and answered the phone without bothering to check the caller ID. The young masters irritation vanished when he heard his limo driver on the phone. He'd only called because school had ended nearly 20 minutes ago and Tamaki hadn't come out yet.

The abrupt interruption knocked Haruhi back to her senses. Tamaki had almost kissed her, and she'd completely forgotten that she wasn't ready for an intimate relationship yet. Haruhi stood there listening to Tamaki talk on his phone when she remembered her initial reason for coming to the music room; to find her History notebook. She decided to search for it while Tamaki was on his phone, it didn't take long until she found her notebook on the seat of one of the many flamboyant couches that occupied the room. After putting her notebook in her bag she walked back towards Tamaki.

"…Alright, I'll be out in a few minutes, Thank You." Tamaki hung up and turned around, "Well, I should be going now, would you like a ride home Haruhi?"

"Oh, it's okay, I'll walk".

"Are you sure?" Tamaki said, a little disappointed by her humble decline.

Haruhi nodded, "Yes"

"Well, at least allow me to be your escort out of the Academy." Tamaki said gracefully extending his hand towards her. Haruhi smiled and accepted. They exited the music room and made their way outside.

"Are you sure you'll be alright", said a concerned Tamaki as they made their way outside the doors of Ouran Academy.

"Yes, I'll be fine", Haruhi chuckled "You don't need to worry so much"

The light snow had stopped falling. "It's still a little bit chilly out here". Tamaki commented and then noticed that Haruhi wasn't wearing anything to protect her from the cold, and just her uniform wouldn't do much. "Haruhi don't you have a scarf?"

"Yeah I do" Haruhi looked through her book bag. She could have sworn she had her blue scarf ealier. "Ah, man, don't tell me I misplaced that too!"

Tamaki held out his purple scarf and loosely wrapped it around her neck.

"Ta-Tamaki-senpai" she looked at his adoring face, her cheeks suddenly felt hot.

"You'll need it more than I will."

Haruhi bowed and thanked him when she felt his lips against her forehead, rendering the girl speechless.

"I'll see you tomorrow Haruhi" Tamaki said soflty. Haruhi could do nothing but smile back at him as they parted ways.

That night Tamaki Suoh played his song once more before going to bed and Haruhi Fujioka held the purple scarf that he lent her closely to her chest as she difted off to sleep in her futon. They were both content and happy knowing that the person they cared for returned their feelings. And although they weren't ready for a romantic relationship yet they will wait for each other until the time is right. But for right now their friendship was more important. Haruhi and Tamaki were more than friends but less than a couple, for now…

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Thank You for reading. Please leave a comment so that I don't get bored! Er…..I mean **please leave comments, because I like comments and I'd really apprieciate the feedback** ^-^

NOTE: Yes! The whole "more than friends but less than a couple" thing, I stole it from His and Her Circumstances (Kare Kano)…


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